What You Love Won't Drain You [into the archives post one]

8:08 AM

Hola readers!

So much has changed in the course of Beautifully Broken (changed from Saved by Grace). I began blogging in 2012 as a young teen and now as an adult. On this blog I've dreamed, hoped, prayed, worshiped, shared, cried, grown. I've finished my series "Kara's Confessions" and now I'm left with Story Snippets which will continue, and now I begin "into the archives."

A look into the past of what was once Saved by Grace and at my most heartfelt posts


What You Love, Won't Drain You
Posted September 2016

For the past couple years you would find me not only doing my own school work but homeschooling my siblings. It was never something my parents made me do. It was something I chose.
By the time I reached 10th grade things were highly stressful for me. I had a lot of schoolwork, a research paper to write my second semester, Algebra I didn't understand a whit, and on top of that I chose to teach more then one class in my sibling's homeschooling.
It was stressful.
It was tough.
"But I love doing this," I'd try to convince myself. "I love teaching. It's a huge passion."
But it wasn't - isn't - my calling.
I spent more time crying, frustrated and stressed, then no.
And it was never something my parents made me do. It was something I chose.
And I chose wrong. It wasn't my call.
Now that I've graduated I felt God speak to my heart and he convicted me: "This isn't what you're supposed to do."
But I tried to convince God. "I love doing this, I love teaching. It's a huge passion."
But God knew and it was something I didn't was to accept - it wasn't my calling. At least not now.

What you love, your calling, what you were made for, won't drain you. At the end of the day if writing stories it supposed to be what God made you for, then you won't feel mentally drained. While staying on the computer may hurt your eyes, while you may have a headache from your own bad grammar and trying to reword sentences to take out the word 'was', you shouldn't feel mentally drained. You shouldn't feel mentally exhausted.
God gave us many passions and talents, and while you may be eager to exercise them now, sometimes they're going to drain you and sometimes that's a sign that it's not meant to be.
At least not this season in your life.
One of the hardest things in my life is trying to figure out which of the things I enjoy doing God wants me to do now. I know sometimes it feels like a waste of talent and dreams to put them on hold, but believe me when I say that it's not worth it to hold onto something that will not only take your time but how you feel mentally. It's no fun to be trapped into something that is your passion but a passion you end up losing because you're exercising it wrong.


Since writing this post, I've found that nothing could be more true. Ironically only months after this post I chose to go to college, but after feeling mentally drained and knowing I couldn't keep up with school, a job, and my call to try and publish a book, I dropped out. I was exhausted inside, my brain swirling, trying to hold down all my dreams at once. It just wasn't working to try and do everything at once.
I'm beginning to see the deep truth in this, that at the end of the day I'm following the calling God has given me. For the whole beginning of 2017 I followed what I wanted to do and let me tell you from experience, only God knows what we really need. It's not easy to take an unblazed trail, but if I were honest? If you follow God, I can guarantee He'll send you down the path you least expect, the least popular, the thing no thinks you should do, and then turns around and blesses you beyond imagining.
You just get this sense of peace when you're doing what you must, what you should, what you were created to do.

It'll be OK.

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