2018 Plans, Changes, Learning

7:18 AM

Hola readers!

Life has changed so much for me in just this one year. One year and I've done so much, changed mentally, spiritually and how I present myself. My hobbies have changed, my goals have changed. Really I feel like a completely different person then I was last year. So much has shaped me in just three hundred some days.
I can't begin to describe how much I've changed inside and out, but perhaps if you've followed the blog long enough, you've been able to witness some of it.

I feel that God is saying that this new year will be a time of healing for me, that I need to focus on the healing of my broken heart in the spiritual and mental sense. I'm bad when it comes to taking care of myself mentally. I'm good at denying Truth, at pretending I'm OK, at not speaking well about what I'm feeling until it consumes me.
Then I break and I have one of my 'nuclear meltdowns', as I call them.  I than blog and rant to family and journal and cry, and then stop and am good for a few months before it happens again. The cycle is vicious and I no longer want to do that, to simply go through the emotions and continue to pick up and move on without taking the time to consider what I need to be doing different.
So there's going to be changes not only taking place in the real world for me, but here on the blog.

I want to learn authenticity of the truest form, to be honest with you readers (as I have been these last few months) but also those around me in my day-to-day life. I've realized that I need a change in my life, that it's time to reconsider things, to find out who I really am.
I'm the girl always hiding behind other images, picking off bits and pieces of people I like and mimicking their style or personality. I tend to say, "OH I like the way you dress/act/speak/etc." And then proceed to follow.
But I don't want to be the version of anyone else.
I want to be me and me only.
In these last few years I haven't.
And I want a change.

I feel that a word God wants me to focus on this 2018 will be, 'healing.' For some long I've pretended that I'm on the road to healing without paying attention to things like confession, trust, or the fact that my anxiety takes control more then God.

So I can't begin to explain all the changes going on around here in my heart and what will probably seep into the way that I blog, but I'm still me, Kara Lynn. I will still be beautifully broken and the posts won't change I suppose so much as the person writing them.
It won't be drastic and maybe for you it won't be so much as a change. My Harry Potter and New Age posts were a reflection of that change already, as well as some of the other posts I've done, which you have all seemed to enjoy.

This blog is nowhere near what it was like back in 2012 when I first began blogging. I've already begin reverting to drafts all my old posts. I'm also currently working on several projects that I'm really excited (yet terrified about!) that I will update you on in the next few months.

I want to be real.
I want to focus on true healing with those around me.
I want to see realism in the truest most beautiful form here on social media and also in my life.
I'm far from perfect, and there's so much that needs changing.
I pray these changes are for the best.

I'm positive they are.

Happy New Year readers! May you have a blessed, blessed year!

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7 of your thoughts

  1. Happy New Year, Kara! I loved reading your blog this year and I look forward to seeing what 2018 will bring you!

    1. Happy New Year to you too sweet Hanne! I always appreciate your lovely, lovely comments. May God bless your 2018. <3

  2. Happy New Years, I hope 2018 is a wonderful year for you! <3

    1. I pray the same for you Gray! May your 2018 be a blessed time for you and your family.

  3. I love your authentic heart and your honesty! I think picking a word that sums up 2018 is awesome; I want to pick one, too, and pray about it. I hope that your new year is the best yet and that it brings healing, peace and joy! Great post. :)

    1. Aww thank you sweet Erin! I want to be as honest and real as possible and I pray my blog reflects that, so your comment made me so happy inside.
      Thank you. <3

  4. Happy New Year, dear friend! May this year be blessed as you follow where God leads you! ♥


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