sorry not sorry i unfollowed you |on avoiding toxic social media|

6:37 PM

Hola readers!

Recently I've really become upset at the turn my feed on media can take -- both what I post and what others are posting. Social media is easily a trap, sucking you into unrealistic expectations. It becomes a place of I and what I'm  dealing with, what I'm doing, who I'm angry at, what I, I, I, I..........
I'm learning to not follow accounts that give me unreaslitic expectations about life, whose posts focus on themselves, who act as though I and the rest of the world are entitled to hear every detail of their lives.
Because when you read these posts it's easy to be drawn along for a ride of jealousy and expectations of what your own life should contain.
And when I said "toxic" in my post title, it's not the obvious toxic I'm talking about either. It's the hot workout photos with a cute body I wish I had. It's the constant highlight photos. It's the cute daily selfie. It's the IG story of your continual great life that makes mine feel a bit hellish.
But it's not just everyone else.
 Honestly? I'm learning not to be this poster either. *Blushes* I am guilty of this too.
Social media has allowed me to meet many beautiful humans (shoutout to Jessica who is one of the most beautiful souls in the world!), brings light in darkness, fun photos, and new worlds.
But it has become my enemy of stress, of keeping my author accounts alive and active. It's become a house of at times jealousy and fantasy of how I wish my life was. It's easy to pretend everything is wonderful when it's not. It's easy to rant and raise hell when really I don't need to complain to the world.
But I'm learning.
I limit my posts to less than three a week on a norm.
I try to keep a theme going on my accounts which limits what I post. IG: All things bookish, occasional life updates for those who care, and my author life. Twitter: Blogger stuff and anything funny because I'm weird. Goodreads: More books. Facebook: Photos for the faraway fam.
Doing this has allowed me more freedom to just live instead of thinking everyone needs to see everything in my life.
Because they honestly don't.
I don't really care what the heck you did have for breakfast. And honestly unless I have a food feed, you really shouldn't care about whether I had breakfast or not this morning.
I enjoy chilling with my cereal and I don't need to see your's and you don't need mine. I'm sure what you ate was lovely but I'm sorry -- I just can't bring myself to care about it every day.
I enjoy your vacay pics but please don't boast about every fun thing in your life.
I get jealous easy.
You probably do too.
Please don't make it harder for me.

I want social media to be a place to share joys and pains and sorrows and fun and fam and friends.
But it can become a competition of who has the best, who looks better, who has more likes. It can become a place for affirmation that we are loved -- or so the number of our followers proclaims.
I don't want that.
It's a trap.
And traps are easy to fall into because they look pretty.
We're no dummies -- we don't fall for something that's obviously bad (at least I hope not). And because social media is both addicting and is one of the best inventions out there, it's easy to forget it's also one of the worst.

So I'm sory I'm not sorry if I unfollow people.
We don't need to feel guilty for keeping a healthy mindset.
You are loved and valued. Your followers do not define that. Your number of likes should not affirm your beauty, and you are beautiful darling.
Let your value not rest in social media.
It will fail you.
Let it rest in what you know is true and live on that -- not what people do or do not tell you.

Happy weekend, readers!
I'm off for a week to hang with the fam on vacay and see one of my longtime, childhood besties. We're planning to chill in a cabin in the woods and I'm excited. <3 <3 <3
See you when I get back!

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5 of your thoughts

  1. Great thoughts!

  2. I think one of the most important things is to be able to determine what inspires you or helps you grow and what makes you jealous. If someone's workout photo ACTUALLY inspires you to work out and get in shape (which is doubtful-- or is that just me XD), fine, but if it starts making you doubt yourself and wish you could change with the snap of a finger... that's when it starts getting dangerous.

    And yeah... Self-centered feeds that are just constant selfies and fluff... I can stomach it for a while but then it's just like can you PLEASE post something important. xD

    Great post! Always a valuable lesson today.

    Ooh, have fun on your vacation! Cabins in the woods are the best. :D

    1. Aww thanks Emily! I can stomach it for awhile as well but then I need something that gives a life lesson. <3 <3 <3
      And I plan on having fun -- ONE MORE DAY!!! XOXO

  3. I've been off blogger for awhile and as I logged in this morning i noted this post in rss feed. I just thought i'd toss in, social media can be a major problem also with time consumption. People post way too much on social media or for an my case, too much time messaging people. Anyways, social media can be stressful! And limiting it can be quite helpful. Finally, to tackle your mentioning of cute workout body pics, if you have been left feeling negativly about yourself, I thought i'd let ya know, ( I hope i don't sound like a loon.) You actually look like a awesome type of person and ain't ugly.


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